Q: What climbs trees and is dangerous?











A: A monkey with a machine gun.

What do you do when you find a spaceman?

You park your car, man.

I fell asleep in the middle of class once.

I propped my Algebra book up in front of me and put my head down.

My gym teacher was furious.

Funny "solution" to a math problem (that I found online)

(1/n) sin x = ?

If you cancel out the 'n's, you get
(1/n sin x) = si x = six = 6

What do you call a sleepwalking nun?

Roamin' Catholic.

Heisenberg is driving with his friend. Suddenly the friend says:
Dude, slow down. You're going 90.
To which Heisenberg angrily replies:
Thank you, moron. Now we're lost.

Gawd struth,I must be as thick as a brick because that joke above is way above my head.

A student was about to enter the classroom, but his teacher stopped him. The student asked,"Why won't you let me in?" The teacher replied,"You need etiquette to enter."

What do you say to an athlete who got offended by your joke? I was just jogging bro.

What is Halloween's favorite plant?





BamBoo!

Accidentally swallowed a tray of Scrabble tiles. I'm afraid my next trip to the bathroom will spell disaster.

Sorry, but I prefer my jokes to be pickled rather than corned.

The Winter Olypics are coming up. Did you hear about the leper hockey game?

There was a face-off in the corner.

DAD joke:-

I was watching Star Wars with my daughter. She asked why Luke was climbing inside a Tauntaun, I said to keep warm.

She asked how warm is it inside. I replied Lukewarm.

Recently, there was a debate as to whether or not we should bring back corporal punishment in school.

I said we should just shoot the little pricks like they do in America.

on second thought, not here.