I like it. :D

Added another! :)

Thanks, they brightened up my morning. ;)

I have used it a hundred times since I read it here. My favorite so far.

My kids and i do stupid knock knock jokes all the time. Here's a few:

KK. WT? Catch. Catch who? Bless you.

KK. WT? Boo. Boo who? It's just me. You don't have to cry about it!

Hey. Remember put-downs? Do kids still try to master those? Like yo mama so poor I saw her taking out the trash. I asked her what she was doing and she said "moving."

Or: you got so much crust in your pants you could take over Betty Crocker.

Somewhere around 8th grade, I started reversing them to things like: yo mama so rich i saw her kicking a mansion down the street. I asked what he was doing and she said taking out the trash.

Lastly, Rodney Dangerfield joke most loved by my father: Getting old is tough. You have to take a pill for everything. Just recently I was on Viagra and ex-lax. It was horrible. I didn't know if i was coming or going.

Why are turds tapered?

So your asshole doesn't slam shut.

Did you hear the one about the elevator?

It's funny on so many levels.

Why are space-dads lost in space?



Because they can't ask for direction to Venus...

What do you do if an Elephant comes in your house?

Learn to swim.

Why did the Romanian stop reading?

To give his Bucharest.

Oh! I didn't see the layered puns until this second later read through. Well done!

What do you get when you put a bird in the freezer?


a Brrrrd!

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have the guts.

I hope I get it right:

A burglar is breaking into a house. Suddenly he hears a voice saying out of the dark:
"Jesus is watching you"
He looks around and sees noting.
So he starts looking for valuables when again this voice said:
"Jesus is watching you"
He looks around more careful and finally finds a parrot in the room.
"What a nice parrot, so you are called Jesus?"
"No my name is Daisy. Jesus is the Rottweiler behind you"

A guy was walking along the beach, found a bottle, and picked it up. A magical genie popped out and said, "Thanks for letting me out. For your kindness I will grant you one wish." The guy said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii, but I can't because I'm afraid to fly and ships make me deathly sick. My wish is for you to build a highway from here to Hawaii." The genie replied, "I'm sorry, but I don't think I can do that. Just think of all the work involved. Think of the huge pilings we would need to hold up that highway and how deep they would have to be to reach the bottom of the ocean. And think of all the cement that would be needed. Plus, since it's such a long span, there would have to be gas stations and rest stops along the way. No, that's just too much to ask. Impossible. Think of another wish." The guy thought for a moment and said, "Well, there is one thing I've always wanted to know. I'd like to be able to understand women - what makes them laugh and cry, why are they so temperamental, why are they so difficult to get along with ...you know, what makes them tick?" The genie thought for a second, then asked, "Do you want that highway with two lanes or four?"

How do you fit four Elephants in a Mini.

Two in the front, two in the back.




How do you know there's been Elephants in your fridge?

There's tyre tracks on the butter.